Nope, I didn't know that...

Okay, yes I know there is a lot of things I don't know.. A LOT!!

But, I'm talking about idle gossip, nothing that really would make a difference in your life.. Just a
"Hmm, I didn't know that."

I was on Twitter and saw a link or a Tweet or whatever you call that.  It was from "OMG FACTS"
It was about celebrities that are "out and proud."
First, let me share with you, I am the very last person on this earth who judges another person about who they want to spend their life with.  My best friend was gay, yes I said was. She took her life eleven years ago. Anyway, the point is, I usually have what people call "Gaydar."
I was definitely wrong, I have no such device in me.  I had no idea these people are gay. I will post the link at the bottom of this post.  I was in shock with a few of these.  Not sure why, I know gay people don't look or act a certain way.  Sometimes, I feel like I live under a rock

Something else I found out,

I was watching the Ellen Degeneres show the other day and the mean lady from The Biggest Loser was on Jillian Michaels.  Anyway, they showed a picture of her and another lady with two babies.  WTF, I didn't know that she was gay!


------>"Out and Proud" <-------

When I publish a post I usually put a lot of thought into it and find cute pictures to go along with it. So forgive me, I did this on a whim.




(Disclaimer:  I am not nor will I ever be homophobic. If I offended you with this post, sorry it's my blog I can say what I want.)

Thanks for reading
xoxo

While you're here click this link and vote for me.

My Life is a Beach

My whole life, when I needed to go to my "Happy Place", it was always the beach.  I love the salty smell of the water, the breeze that forces me to breath through my nose and relax.  The sounds of the waves crashing. Damn, just writing it relaxes me.

When Chris and I decided to move here, what excited me the most was the beach.  Although, I was very surprised to find out how close we were.  If you ask me if it's less than two hours away, then that close.  No, we don't live on the beach.. YET!!  When we get older and kids are moved out, that is where I will retire.

We are only 10 to 20 minutes from the beach, depending on traffic.

So, we live near the beach we go at least twice a month... I still love it, but it doesn't relax me the way I thought it would. I think I'm more relaxed thinking about it then I am while I'm there.

I think I figured out why...

Actually, two reasons..

1.  Emilie
2.  Andrew

Yep, they basically forced themselves into my happy place and tore the shit up.  While in my happy place I sit in my chair facing the ocean and close my eyes and just be.

When I'm forced to bring them to my happy place, there is constant bitching about something.
Emilie will only go into the water up to her ankles and Andrew, he won't go 10 feet near the surf.

Emilie:
"Mommy, can you walk down the beach with me and pick up shells?"
"Can you help me get the sand out of my ass crack?"
(Well, she doesn't say "ass crack" or I would smack her on the ass.)
"I'm bored, can I bury you in the sand?"


Andrew:
"Mommy, my hands are dirty."
"I want to fish."

Andrew likes to throw shells into the water, although it's very hard for him to do that, he doesn't throw very far and like I said before, he won't even get that close to the water.  He usually ends up knocking me upside the head with one.
"Damnit kids, I'm in my freaking happy place!"

While trying to tune out the voices and bitching that never existed in my happy place before.  I sit in my chair ready to relax.  Even though I refused to be buried in the sand, it's flying all over me, in my hair on my blasted happy chair.  I look behind me and Andrew is digging in the sand like a dog and throwing it all my way.  UGH!!!!

The damn bandits who talk too much in my happy place, make me get up and walk or do whatever they want to do (except bury me in the sand) just to keep them quiet.
So, I'm up and walking down the beach picking up shells, I of course love to watch people as well.  There are only a couple things that make me stop in my tracks and watch.
A family of tourists or a overweight Dad in the ocean with their kids and Dad keeps getting knocked down by the waves.  I can't help but laugh! I'm sorry, that is just too freaking funny!

The other thing is surfers! It's hard to see their faces, but those wet suits are what really catch my eye!

Not thinking about what his face looks like right now!

As we walk back to the area of the beach that we claimed our's for the afternoon.  "What the hell, someone is in my happy chair! Oh hell no!!

Well, at least he's a cutie!

Without much force I get Andrew out of my chair and sit down to relax from my walk. I look out in front of me and see Chris in his happy place. Man, that shit is not fair.. the kids are too damn scared to go out into the water to bug him. I'm not a fan of the creepy crawlers that dwell in that water, I usually stay on the beach as well.

Just, as I get comfortable, breathe in relaxation, exhale noise and everything else that followed me here.
Time to get up again, Andrew wants me to take pictures of him on the sand dune.

Okay, picture done, I run back to my chair to find Chris complaining that the fishing isn't working out like he thought it would. Okay? So?

"Time to go."  Chris states.
"What the mother corn dog lovin' people!"

Fine, I'll just go home and dream about how I can come here all by myself one day.

I made this when I was supposed to be picking up shells.

Thanks for reading

xoxo

While you're here, click this link and vote for me

Get out of my way Ellen!

If you read my last post about being positive and all that business, there is a affirmation that I need to say to myself more.  I only think it, I never say it out loud.  What the hell am I afraid of?  Am I afraid to say it out loud because, I feel like the end isn't near?  Because, if I say it I will be held accountable?
I need to be held accountable, everyone should be held accountable if they tell people what their dream is.
Right?

I have it all in my noggin, it's all there but....  Damn that "but" always slips out of my mouth.  I need to stop using that word!  It's me, I'm standing in my way.

I think it's because I'm afraid of rejection.  Yes, I know everyone is afraid of rejection. I don't give a crud, I'm talking about me here!

My dream is possible, attainable, I know it is.  If I close my eyes I can imagine my dream becoming my life.

I'm not sure why it is when I get on my laptop I avoid that little file.  The first think I go to is that blasted Facebook!   It's a file that will change my life as I know it.  I can only hope and dream that it will make my life and my family's life better.


Why can't I find the motivation within myself to just freaking do it!

So, I'm here to tell you all what my dream is, what the 4 word affirmation I need to say to myself everyday.

I need you.. yes you, to  hold me accountable.


I AM A WRITER!


Yes, Yes!! I've said it. Damn that felt so good.  I've actually never written that down before.

Maybe, I don't think of myself as a writer because what I want people to read isn't out there yet.  I'm not a published writer.  I want to be a published writer more than anything.  Even if I won the lottery tomorrow, I would still want this so bad.

I've been working on a book for over a year.  I have the whole thing already written in my head.  I personally think it is amazing.  I've typed out many, many words. Then I've deleted all those words.  I stopped I decided no, that's not the story I want to write.  For a few months I didn't write, but I never stopped thinking about that story.  So, I started it all over again.  What if I get it all done and then realize I could have made it better by doing this or that?

Okay, I need to just get the hell over it and do what I want to do, NO, what I NEED to do.

Thanks for reading my page of rantings.
xoxo

I can be positive damnit!

When I worked as a Real Estate Agent, our Broker would pound daily affirmations in our head.  Mind you this was the first and only sales job I have had.  (I really sucked at it)  But, I did start to understand why positive thinking and daily affirmations help.  Because, I was such a shitty sales person I needed all the help I could get.   God knows my selling skills didn't help me sell a property.

This quote was used quite often in the Real Estate office. 

Anyway, I left the real estate biz back in 2008 and returned to administrative work, which I absolutely love!
It's been so long since someone reminded me everyday about being positive.   I've really gotten out of the habit of doing affirmations.  I really try to stay a positive person, but shit happens and it just pisses me off and puts me in a bad fucking mood!

You know how when a bad thing happens and it just sets you off?  It seems like after that EVERYTHING goes wrong.  Well, I know it happens to me a lot.  Are we sending negative energy out in the universe when that one little shitty thing happens?

I some how stumbled across this website and they are talking about positive thinking and affirmations.

The article states when you get in a foul mood you say things like "I'm so stressed, "Why do things have to be so hard." those words, phrases and thoughts we are affirming and making this our reality.  So, does this mean I can't bitch about anything anymore?  And, if I do, I'm telling the universe to send all the bullshit my way?  UGH!!
So at the end of the article the writer challenges her readers to change their language, instead of saying and thinking negatively to think positive. Okay, I will bite.. I will try this challenge for one week.  Starting now...
So, now that I've read this article I had planned on telling you what I've been up to in the past week or so, guess I will have to spin it around and tell you without sounding negative or bitchy.  This should be interesting..

THE LAST WEEK IN MY AMAZING LIFE..

I've been open and honest in my most of my posts about my life and our financial situation.  Things happen in life, bad decisions are sometimes made and we all have to live with our choices and consequences.
We got behind on our car payment a while back, we tried working with them some (not as much as we should).  Before moving to the town we are in now, my car broke and we were left with one vehicle.  The same vehicle that we were behind on the payments.  I woke up Saturday morning and went outside for my morning cigarette with my coffee and I looked out into the parking lot and noticed our truck wasn't in the the usual spot. I had drove it the night before to go the laundry mat and I remember exactly where I parked it.  I started to get freaked out, I opened the front door and poked my head in, "Chris, please tell me you moved the truck this morning?"  I asked with a tremble to my voice.  His expression showed me that he did not move the truck.  Yep, you guessed it, it finally all caught up with us. The truck was re-possessed!! It's that just dandy? (not being negative)  Can't think of anything better than, not having to look over our shoulder anymore for tow trucks following us.  Oh, and that pesky cost of gas!  Long story short or a little shorter...
I have a friend who has a friend who was selling her old 2000 Saturn and she offered it to us for $200.  I was super excited about it. The car looked in great condition and it's a very good price.  So of course we couldn't refuse.  We were waiting for the title to come from Michigan for a few weeks.  We were going to put the new car in my name.  The strangest thing happened, the title finally came in Thursday and our truck was repo'd on Saturday night.  Thankfully, it didn't leave us with out a vehicle!  THANK GOD!
I'm actually happy it happened that way, to register a vehicle and transfer a title in Florida is pretty high, we were going to have to pay around $300 or so.  Now that Chris no longer has a vehicle we just transferred his tag onto the new car, less than $100! YAY.

Let me tell you about my new car...

So, when you buy a car for $200 you basically get a car with constant heat, I'm not complaining that their isn't air in the car.. Nope not me.  A bonus, I get to climb out the window like the Dukes of Hazzard, because the driver side door doesn't open!  I won't call myself Daisy for sure but I will call myself her slightly older Aunt, who wears capri's.
Because, the car is much smaller than our Ford Explorer, gas mileage will be much better. Last night while driving to pick up Chris from work, I was blessed with a message right there on my dash.  I changed the words a bit, I interpret them as "I Love Life."  Some people, well negative people would probably read it as "Service Engine Soon."  I don't this week, because this is my positive challenge week.  I don't think I would be any happier even if I won the lottery, I'm living the freaking dream right now! (((cleansing breath)))

So, that's what's been going on in my life in the past week.
Thankfully, I read that "Positive" article before I wrote my own post, no one had to listen to me bitch.

Below is the link to the article I read if anyone else wants to take the same challenge.


Thanks for reading.
xoxo

POSITIVELY POSITIVE

Hopeless

Some of you who know me, know I love to read. Other's who don't.. well there you go I love to read.  I actually hadn't started reading novels until I picked up the Twilight series.  I was a new stay at home mom with an infant and after months I started to become quite bored.  I've worked since I was 16 years old.  And I had my last baby when I was 35.  So, I was bored and all this hype was going on about this Twilight story. My best friend Amber had all of the books and she said I could borrow them from her. When she lugged in 4 huge books I almost fell over.  "Are you serious, I haven't read that many books in my entire life."

I love a challenge so I jumped right in.  That was three years ago, and I haven't been seen without a book since.  I read so much while I was home with my newborn, I didn't get shit done.

Lately, I only read at night or when I'm giving Andrew a nap.  Since I figured out that you can read books from your cell phone.. Well, I'll be damned, that shit is for me and it's cheaper.  It's all down hill from there. I HAVE to read every single night before I fall asleep.  (I used to be addicted to the T.V.)  I've read all kinds of books.  Love stories, mysteries, horror and true stories.

I don't know if it's because I read so much, or because I love to write as well, I can usually figure out the end of the book many chapters before the book ends.  I give myself a pat on the back when I finish the book and it's the ending I thought it would be.  At the same time, I'm a little disappointed because I was able to figure it out.  I love to be surprised. Yes, I even read the 50 Shades Trilogy and loved all three of them, but I was able to predict the ending way before it ended.  Many, many parts of that story did shock the hell out of me though!!

This blog is inspired by the book I just read.  I seriously could not put it down.  I even read it during the day and got nothing done all damn day.  But, it was so damn worth it.

I'm recommending the book:  Hopeless by: Colleen Hoover

This book is definitely a must read.  It has twists and turns all over the place.  It actually caught me by surprise, which hardly ever happens. Because, this book took my breath away is why I'm recommending it.

Click on the link below to purchase your Kindle version.  It's only $3.99!

Sometimes discovering the truth can leave you more hopeless than believing the lies...

That's what Sky realizes after she meets Dean Holder. A guy with a reputation that rivals her own and an uncanny ability to invoke feelings in her she's never had before. He terrifies her and captivates her all in the span of one encounter, and something about the way he makes her feel sparks buried memories from a past she wishes could just stay buried. 

Sky struggles to keep him at a distance knowing he's nothing but trouble, but Holder insists on learning everything about her. After finally caving to his unwavering pursuit, Sky soon finds that Holder isn't at all who he's been claiming to be. When the secrets he's been keeping are finally revealed, every single facet of Sky's life will change forever.




Hope you all enjoy this book as much as I did.  I will be looking for more books by this author.

xoxo