I've compiled a small list of the shit my 3 year old son says damn near on a daily basis.
I'm not the normal kind of girl who likes to talk very much. I have so many things going on in my head at all times that there isn't much to say out loud.
My son is a different though, he says everything and anything that is on his mind.
When Andrew talks to me he expects an answer. A normal grunt from Mommy will not suffice it either.
I think he gets that shit from his father. He talks more than any man I've ever met.
Andrew will also keep repeating himself over and over until I've acknowledged that he's made a statement or asked me a question that seriously I have to stop and think if he really just said that!
1. My balls are wet Mama
Um, Okay that's weird!
2. Does Spiderman get wedgies?
I have no freaking idea!
3. Smell my hand
What the shit Andrew, I'm not smelling your hand!
4. I gonna punch Dora in the face
Whoops not supposed to laugh at that. We don't say punch Andrew!
5. Trust me.. just trust me
Yeah, I've heard that one before.
6. I like when you dance mama, you look like chicken.
Great, nice to know. Thanks!
7. Does my hair look like noodles?
What? No your hair does not look like noodles!
8. Daddy can I use your lipstick?
It's not lipstick Andrew. It's Chap-Stick - Daddy
9. Why does my butt hole itch?
Eww! I don't know.. Is that why you asked me to smell your hand?
10. I gonna punch Mickey Mouse.
HeHe! Oops. Not nice Andrew.
11. Sorry Mama, I peed on the shower curtain
Again!?! Really!! What the hell!!
12. When I get big can I say bad words?
No, you may not!
13. You freakin' me out!
Where the hell did you hear that?
14. Today is the perfect day to kill ants.
Great! Is also a perfect day for a nap!
15. Look Mama, my weenie is big.
Dammit Andrew, keep your hands out of your pants!
16. I gonna punch Blues Clues!
Yeah, me too!
17. Mama, Sissy breaf is stinky!
Well, then don't smell it.
18. Is Daddy's weenie big like mine?
HeHe... Yep sure is!
What I find fucking hilarious is that Andrew asks me all of these questions and more during the day. Sometimes, Andrew will ask Chris a random question just like above. Chris will automatically look at me like; Are you kidding me? Is he really asking me this?
Yep, he sure is..answer your son!
Thanks for reading.