Friday, March 29, 2013

Holy Shit Balls!!

If I can quote the old fella on Duck Dynasty.. "Happy, Happy!"   That's how I'm feeling right now, along with loved, inspiring and just fucking EPIC!!! hehe.

I have been awarded 2 awards today, the first one proves I am awesome! Because, Menopausal Mother said so!  She has given me the "Epically Awesome Award of Epic Awesomeness."  Holy Shit Balls that is a mouth full!  (That's what she said.)

If you don't know who this funny blogger lady friend is, you need to go visit her as soon as you are done here. I'm pretty sure everyone who is anyone knows Marcia.  
Okay, so I'm supposed to give you 10 facts about myself and then pass this award off to 10 other bloggers.

I really hate talking about myself, I am quite boring..

1.  I am freaking horrified to go through tunnels, not the tunnels you drive in. The one's I'm talking about are the tunnels you sometimes have to go through when you are in a bounce house thingy.  I have re-occurring nightmares that I attempt to go through a tunnel and the fucking thing loses it's air and it collapses on me.
By the way, I had to go through one today at a kids place we went to, I didn't know it was there until I was far away from the entrance.  And, my kids were watching me.  I held my breath the whole time and prayed to the bouncy house Gods to let me make it through.

2.  My Dad used to call me "bones" when he was alive.  My friends in High School thought it was so funny and decided to call me "Boner."  Actually, they like to scream it down the halls. I used to get embarrassed easily back then.

3.  I can tell you that just because someone is skinny doesn't mean they are in shape.  I took the kids on a walking trail the other day and they had those exercise stations.  I was quite surprised that I was able to do 2 pull ups. Well, let me tell you what, the next day my whole upper body was so stiff and sore, I could barely move my arms! Never doing that business again. (ha-ha)

4.  I love dolphins!  I squeal every time I get to see one in the wild.

5.  I hate all holidays!

6. I gag whenever someone talks about boogers or snot.

7. I bitch and moan that I never get time away from my kids, but as soon as I'm gone for more than an hour I miss them horribly and want to go home to see them.

8.  I really miss the phrase "EAT ME."

9.  Some how during my first pregnancy my daughter who was 9 lbs 12 oz, 22 inches long, bent my sternum bone before she was born. When I lay down it looks like I have another (small) boobie.

10. I have no idea what a vaginal mesh is.  I see the lawyer commercials all the time, but I have no clue what the hell they are.

Okay, hope you learned something useful about me. Doubt it though.
Here are the 10 bloggers I am nominating for his EPIC award.

 The Basement Window
 Mom Rants and Comfy Pants
 Break my Wings I have a Broomstick too
Your Daily Dose of Damn
Flight Plan
More than Mommies
The Honest Truth by the Honest Bitch
Raising Wild Things
The Girl Next Door Drinks and Swears
Moore Organize Mayhem

The next award I was awarded was the "Very Inspiring Blogger Award."  Aubree at The Basement View. You have to go check out her blog. Her writing will blow your effing mind! TALENTED!!!

I'm supposed to tell you 7 things about myself and then nominate 15 bloggers for this award.

I'm seriously out of shit to tell you about me and it's almost 10:00 PM and I want to go read my book.
I thought, since Aubree was the one who gave me this award, I would tell you 7 facts about myself and how I know Aubree.

1.  I've known Aubree (The Basement View) since I was a teenager.
2.  I worked with Aubree at Burger King while in High School
3.  We rocked our BK visors back then!
4.  I was honored to be at Aubree's wedding a long ass time ago!
5.  The very first blog I ever read was hers.  She inspired me to start my own.
6.  We are working on a writing project together.
7.  We will be rich an famous from that project.

Ch Ch Ch Changes
Maple Syrup Land
Outlaw Mama
Delectably Dawn
My Half Assed Life
Mod Mom Beyond IndieDom
Funny Baby Videos
The Harried Mom
Crap No One Tells You
Snarky Heifer
Fear No More...A Day in the Life
The Non Martha Momma
Cranky Old Man
You're Doing it Wrong

Well, there you have it.. there is 15 more Very Inspiring Bloggers, go give them a pat on the back for this award.

I want to also thank 3 other bloggers who gave me the Liebster Award over the last week. That will be ELEVEN Liebster Awards. I am seriously really tired and I don't wanna play no-mo'!  But I do want to thank them.

A Mom's Point of View

Little Mayberry Life

Owl Always Blog

Thank you everyone for these amazing awards.

I want to let everyone know, that I'm working on making a brand new spankin' award.  I can't wait to give it away.

Thanks for reading


  1. Congrats! Marcia knows how to pick 'em, so you should be honored!

    I also don't know what vaginal mesh is. Shouldn't get ointment and antibiotics for that?

  2. Congratulations. That's a lot of awards!

  3. Congratulations to you and THANK YOU for the nod! We are so flattered that you would think of us! Keep doing what you are doing. Love laughing with you!

  4. So...does this mean I can call you "Boner" from now on since we're friends??? You rocked this awards post----got to know you even better than I did before, which is why I LURVE you! <3

    1. Sure you can call me Boner! Can't promise you I can live up to it tho! haha!!! I lurve you too

  5. Congratulations. Isn't it wonderful knowing how highly you are thought of by your peers?

  6. Congrats on all your awards!! And thank you for thinking I'm inspiring :)

    You're right, it's definitely time for an "eat me" resurgence. Also, now I have to hit google to find out what the hell vaginal mesh is

  7. Congratulations on your award...

    I LOVE Dolphins... they are amazing:)

  8. are truly epic and I loved all your fun facts! Thanks for passing some of your awesomeness on to me. *bows down*

    Penny at Mom Rants and Comfy Pants

  9. I am laughing out loud...belly laughing at that. You are soooo hilarious! Glad we're friends and so glad that you nominated me!! :) You rock girlfriend....I'll try to make you proud!

  10. Thank you for the nomination. Never heard of this award, but I will play, just might not be for a few days to a week or so.

    Jackie @ The Non-Martha Momma

  11. Anyone who's a friend of Menopausal Mother is a friend of mine. :) By the way--why do you miss the phrase "Eat me"? You really should use it more often! Just do a quick sweep and make sure the kids aren't around, or save it for really, really special occasions. If the kids do catch you, you can just act like you were being the voice for some healthy food like peas...

  12. Congratulations on your awards. Your page gave me a laugh, thanks for that! I'm following you now with GFC

    Lorna K
    Life with RA is a Pain

  13. Thank you so much! And congratulations to you on all the awards!

  14. Congratulations on the awards. And dolphins really do rock. They are totally cool. Hope you have a wonderful day.

    Heidi’s Wanderings

  15. Congratulations! And thanks for the nomination! :) Look forward to posting my "acceptance speech!" :)

  16. You deserve it! And, thank you so much for nominating Crap No One Tells You! Keep writing!

  17. Congratulations, well deserved! xo

  18. Well, fuck! First of all... congrats on the award. Secondly, I can't believe it has taken me two weeks to realize that YOU GAVE ME a fucking award, too. You rock, sister!! Thank you!

    I know this is a lame excuse for replying so late, but I suck at checking comments on my blog. Mostly because they're usually spam. I'm always shocked when a real, live person comments.

    I love you. Peace out!

  19. P.S. Your capcha thingy sucks really hairy nads. Twice.


Lay it on me!