Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Post request..



I had a post request from Therese over at You're Doing it Wrong.  I freaking love her blog, she makes me actually laugh out loud!  I had to edit this really quick. Therese wrote a post named Bag of Dicks.. just the title made me snort!!!

She asked me to write a post about the differences of my children because my oldest went to daycare while I worked, and my youngest stays home with me.

This request was brought on from one of my posts... Touchy Feely.

When I wrote the post above, I hadn't actually thought about the differences in my children.
So thanks Therese, you made me think!  That usually doesn't end well for anyone involved. ;)

After, a few ibuprofen from analyzing my children this is what I came up with.

So, after I had my daughter who is now 9 years old, she started daycare at 3 months old.
My kids are five and half years apart, so when my son was born Chris and I decided where we could afford for me to stay home with him.

Manners
Normally, when a child goes to daycare or any type of school, the are taught manners.  Schools in Florida seem to be very strict when it comes to manners.  The first time my daughter came home and addressed me as ma'am, I almost popped her in the mouth.  I HATE that term!!!  It makes me feel old.  I explained to her that she does not need to answer me yes or no ma'am.  She gladly agreed.  I'm not sure why people in the south feel like that's good manners.  She's has had adults in the past, scold her for not answering them with ma'am! WTF. People!! Nope, not my kid. You better be happy she's answering your ass at all!!

She now has a problem with saying, "Please, Thank you, Excuse me."  She either won't say it at all or if I correct her she gets major attitude with me about it. What the hell, she used to have manners, what the hell happened to them.

My son who is 3, says Thank you, Please and all that jazz.  If I hand him something he will say "Thank you Mama."  and if I don't say anything  he will say. "Mama, say Your Welcome!."  I didn't need to brainwash him into saying these terms.  I guess he just listens and learns.

Out-going vs. Shy

My daughter is just like me when I was her age. Very, very shy! I wouldn't talk to anyone first.
I've come out of my shell as I've gotten older.  Here's an example of her personality.
I was in Walmart with the kids a few weeks ago, I was in the deodorant aisle.  I was trying to pick out a nice sexy scent for Chris. I saw a younger man doing the same thing.  So, I offered him a coupon on one the brands he was eyeing. It was a really good coupon and he would get the product for less than a $1!
He took the coupon and thanked me.  After we walked away, Emilie said. "Mommy, why did you just talk to that man, you didn't even know him."  I told her, "Well, I was helping him. And how are you going to meet new people if you never talk to them?"

My son, on the other hand... when I take the kids to the playground, he will make friends with any of the boys he sees running around! He will stalk those kids until they acknowledge his presence.  He is not shy at all.  He will wave and say hi to anyone around.
Emile will look at him like he has 3 heads because he is able to walk up to a new kid and say "Hi, wanna play?"  (Thank god, he doesn't say, "Wanna Play Doctor: anymore!)  J/K!!! HAHA!

I want Mommy!

Like I said in the Touchy Feely post, Andrew is up my butt at all times. Except at the playground.
I seriously can't even go to the store by myself with out him throwing a full blow tantrum like I'm leaving him forever!  He will stand there and kick and bang the door until Chris picks him up and tries to calm him down. Because, Chris doesn't have as much patience as I do, that usually ends with one of two ways.. boy bribed with candy to quit crying. Or, sent to his room to watch T.V with candy!

It's taken 3 long years to get him to even go somewhere with Chris without me. Even when that happens, he orders me to stay.  "Mommy, you stay here I go with Daddy."  I guess he does that so he knows where I will be.

Emilie, I assume because she went to daycare she is okay with it.  She never through fits because I was going somewhere without her.

It makes it tough for me though. I feel so guilty because he's so upset when I leave.


Independence

Now this just confuses me!

Emilie seems to need help with anything and everything.  Brushing her hair, getting her towels for the shower, putting her clothes away, making her bed, finding her a snack.. I could seriously go on and on. Everything I listed above is stuff she can do by herself and she's done them all herself before!  I think she just gets into a mood and wants to piss me off too.

Andrew, he doesn't want me to help him with anything.  He will climb on counters to get what he wants. Then gets mad at me when I help him. "I do it by myself Mama!"
Like most men, I'm sure that independence will end when he hits puberty!


Shit, I'm so confused now.. see what happens when I have to analyze things?  I have no idea why one acts one way and the other acts the other.  I'm not sure if it is because I stay home with one and didn't with the other. Or, maybe it's just their personality!

I try to parent the same way with both, but they are 2 different people so that's impossible sometimes.
Although, bribing with candy works on both!!

Thanks for reading
xoxo
















18 comments:

  1. I agree ~ each kid is different. I parented the kids the EXACT same way and they all 3 turned out completely different. And it's all good.

    BTW, that clown picture was super creepy!!

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  2. This is so funny--mine are the opposite. The boys were always doing their own thing and forgetting manners...but my girls were needy and always wanting to be held or cuddled. When the boys wanted attention, they usually threw something at me. Oh Lord, I don't miss those days. Funny post---love the creepy clown at the end. I send that guy to my adult children just to get back at them now Lol!

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  3. I think children are different, no matter how we parent them... I have parented both my children pretty well the same... one was independent and argumentative, the other is needy and rarely argues with me... they are both special in their own way :)

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  4. Loved to read this! I like your writing style! My first (3) is a very vocal chid and his brother (1) is a spider, he climbs on everything and is super mobile. But they are BOTH very attached to me! Just like your son. Maybe it's a boy thing or maybe its a Stay at home mom thing.

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  5. I always enjoy reading blogs about people's children and how different they are. We only had one child (now 33) and it's hard to imagine how each and every child is special and unique.

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  6. You said it right. What might work (sucha s bribing) for one, might not for the other. lol but that's the beauty of it I think. Each kid to their own.

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  7. I think to a certain degree, the daycare versus staying at home thing is irrelevant. Kids have different personalities and respond differently to things, so I don't think you can point to one thing or the other as a cause and effect relationship.

    It sounds like you're doing just fine with raising them!

    Lisa Newlin
    Http://lisanewlin.com

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  8. I love this post. I've only got one child, so I have nothing except her cousins to compare her to, and she is so different to all of them. She's my little PR person, and she loves chatting to strangers when we go out. I even had one guy ask if he could be her grandfather. I actually feel invisible if I do manage to get out without her because I never get anywhere near as much attention as I do when she tags along.

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  9. I love this post. I have 4 kids all with very different personalities, so I am not sure daycare vs staying at home changes much but I did love this post
    www.mommysrambles.blogspot.com

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  10. Well, it's not exactly hard science, is it? We can't tell, YOU can't even tell, how much of those difference stem for their age/gender/brains they were born with. I guess I would ask...since science can't be applied...what does your gut say? Does your gut wish you could have been home with your daughter too? Or could you ship the boy off to daycare tomorrow without a twinge of guilt cuz you know your daughter turned out fine?

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  11. My gut says I like them just the way they are. I'm sure staying home with me factors in somewhere. But, I like that they are different! Makes my life so much more interesting.

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  12. I loved this post all the way to the end when I got to the picture of that nasty creature at the end of it. Now it's going to be your damn fault when I can't sleep or have freaking night mares. shame on you girlfriend.

    I've always seen little boys with manners and such. Yesterday I was around a 2 yr old little girl and she had manners. Thank you. Please. so I guess it just depends.

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  13. Hi there! I have ventured over from Linkin’ With My Ladies. I am co-hosting this month and I just wanted to thank you for participating! Love your blog! XOXO, Mandi @ All My Happy Endings

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  14. omg, ellen...i am so glad i wasn't drinking or eating when i got to the part where you wrote, "The first time she called me ma'am i almost popped her in the mouth." I let out one of those barking laughs that startled the sleeping pets (and hubs). Funny shit.

    By the by, I think that their gender has a lot to do with it. Boys are just easier. And it also has everything to do with which sperm made it to which egg. Personality is a huge factor.

    I am so glad you mentioned the "bag of dicks" post. I loved the post and the blog.

    keep'em coming, girl!!

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  15. Hilarious! I'm your newest follower via the Blog Hop...I hope you visit and say hi :)
    Susan

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  16. Following from the TGIF Blog Hop. Hope you have a great evening!
    Nicky
    http://www.feelingtheemptynest.com

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  17. Wow, you definitely would have had to do some thinking for this post! I only have one child at the moment, and I can't wait to have another someday. I'm excited to see how different my children will be :)
    Christine @ Musings of a Single Mama
    www.musingsofasinglemama.com

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  18. Kids are very different. My youngest will attempt to make his own pancakes- not exactly successfully but he would probably eat the batter raw anyway. My oldest will lay there and say she's hungry for two hours before she takes initative, she is 14 and capable my son is 4 and well 4.

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Lay it on me!