Thursday, September 26, 2013

Girl Talk

First I would like to apologize for not posting anything lately.  All is well here, I just haven't felt motivated or inspired by anything to share with you all.  Or, it could be that I've been lazy as hell and haven't turned on my computer in nearly a month.  Oh well.  I have something I would like to share today and hopefully get some great advice to help me out.

My daughter will be 10 years old in January, double digits!!  (sniff-sniff)
Anyway, the other day I walked into her room to make sure she was awake and getting ready for school.
I never knock when I go into my kids rooms, so I just barged right in to find my daughter half naked screaming at me to get out!!!  She pulled her shirt that she was wearing over her bottom area while she screamed at me.

I quickly backed out of her room and closed the door.  What the hell just happened?!?  She has never screamed at me to get out of her room.

So, I do believe it may be time to have a little girl talk with my no so little girl.

I don't want to go into the whole sex talk business.  I still think she may be too young for that.

 I think I need to talk to her about what happens when a little girl grows up into a big girl and what changes will happen to her body.

I DO NOT want to make the same mistake as my mother did with me...
Let me take you back to age 14 (before I had sex) but after I started my period.

It was summertime and we were invited to go to a lake with my parents friends to have a cookout and swimming.  When we arrived I discovered that I had started my period and I was very upset because I wanted to go swimming and I knew you couldn't swim with a pad on.

I walked head down to my mom and let her know that I started my period and I can't go swimming.

She went to the store and bought a box of tampons.  Tampax tampons, you know the really old kind that only came with a cardboard applicator.  My mom handed me the box and told me to go to the bathroom.

I looked at her like what the hell am I supposed to do with these.  She said, "There are directions in the box"  And she walked away.

I took the box and went into the nearest stall and unwrapped the package and studied the directions carefully.   With very, very shaky hands I wasted the first 3 tampons because I thought I had popped my own cherry.  I finally talked myself into trying it again, sweaty, shaky hands, cramped neck from looking down for so long I did it, and prayed to God I was still a virgin.

So here's my dilemma...

I want to be able to talk to my daughter about anything!  I want her to feel comfortable enough for her to come to be for anything as well.  My daughter knows me as the smart ass, funny Mom who finds funny  in just about anything.  And, she's a shy and quiet person who doesn't like to share her feelings.

I tried to talk to her about getting a training bra soon and she turned red and ran out of the underwear aisle from me.

Does anyone have any advice for me?  I want to talk to her about hair and boobies and periods, and I would like to do it with out cracking up laughing or making her feel embarrassed about it.

Thanks for reading.



  1. Oh Ellen... I feel for you here... I always want to be open with my children about these things. I have talked about the bra and periods and boys... my daughter is 10. I'm not the funny mama though..yet I am pretty cool mama, for 50. I have been talking about this with her since she was 5 or 6, in different terms. Like you, I want her to know she can always talk to me, about anything...nothing is off limits. I wish I had some great advice for you but you know your daughter best and I only know how to talk to mine. I hope you find a way to talk with her soon :)

  2. Aww...Ellen. You two need to go and have a girls day and just talk. Go to wherever she feels comfortable, the beach, the mall, in the car and just talk about life and how our bodies change. You need to let her know that it's okay to wonder about our bodies, they are wonderful things, that it's okay to touch and feel so she can get to know herself. I remember being so shy that when my breasts began to form I was ashamed for my mom to see them. It shouldn't be that way and you aren't the mom to make it that way. I'm shy and modest too. Talk to her and let her know that anything she tells you is SAFE with you. Let her know that exploring her body is private but nothing to be ashamed of. Are there any videos on youtube about this? Hormones are charged up and she is growing up so fast. Don't do as our mothers did and leave it all up to us. And as I learned, start knocking on the door. ;) xxx Call me if you feel the need to talk I'm home all weekend.

  3. talk to a counselor/therapist. i have no suggestions but my mom found out about my period long after it happened. i felt so betrayed and ashamed that she didn't tell me it was coming. i was young--elementary school. the nurse had a chat with us right before "it" happened to me. i was 13 with the body of a 19 year old. there is nothing to be ashamed of. i was raised in a prude catholic house and we are not prude yet we are catholic. i'm eager to find out how you discussed this.


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